Deception Boink

I do not intend to be insensitive but why does THIS maid make me… queasy?

Her lies are pathetic; if she’d lie at you,obviously she wasn’t even thinking. At home, our IQ levels are not to be undermined. She knows that, but then she bludgeons us with all ludicrous imbento (hoax). Let us call her Alice.

Alice has a different religion from ours, and fortunately, she has always been given consideration to attend their mass on a Sunday. She goes to their temple, a five-minute tricycle ride from us. So, that’s just fair. She leaves at nine in the morning and comes back at two or so in the afternoon.

One day, she tells me that she does not really attend masses in the neighborhood. “Where do you go then?” I ask. She says she travels pa via jeepney to another temple relatively far from the former and indeed, very impractical. I argue that she’s lucky she gets permission to loiter around, so I tell her to quit that stupid itinerary.

With all the lies in the world, I hate her more with this one…

In an extremely hot afternoon, Alice keeps on jabbering about what she just saw in Sta. Lucia and Robinsons Metro East (the two giant malls nearest to us, and sooner, SM Marikina, which faces the janitor-fish orphanage Marikina River) the day before. She tells us that the motnh-long sale is so fun she can’t stop but to saliviate from window shopping because as she puts it, she was broke at that time.

And then she cracks, “In Rusty Lopez, they’re even selling shoes for kids for a price of five pesos.”

Wow. Can you not believe that?

If my cousin-in-law and me were bird-brained, we could have gone of to the malls in five seconds to shop for those oh so cheap shoes, and then sell it for a more handsome price, say P350, to hungry consumers, or to just give it to Kyle and Belle. What a terrific attempt!

But no, we have such thing as intelligence.

“Why did you not buy one pair for me?” my cous-in-law questions the poor girl.

Alice is in a situation wherein a lie detector won’t be anymore needed in this world. Even if she thinks that we haven’t been in A Mall since childhood, we know how enterprise works. And as for me, I KNOW economics. You do not need Adam Smith for this, not even Homer SImpson.

For goodness sake, Alice are you kidding me?


About barrycyrus

Hi, I'm Barry Viloria, 21 and not a blogger. I occasionally bitch about what's hot, what's not, what's life-threatening and what's Blake Lively wearing but I refuse to be called a "blogger." That's it.

Posted on September 2, 2008, in Pointlessness and tagged , , . Bookmark the permalink. 3 Comments.

  1. When I was yopunger our nanny told us that she was feeding her pet, a mermaid, which she keeps in a well in her province, with bread and rice. And I totally believed her.

    And when I was in kindegarten, our principal used to scare us with a story that she has eyes behind her head and even if she has her back on us she would still catch us if ever we talk, then if ever that happens, she said she’ll pinch us until we bleed and she’ll put salt on our cut. And I believed her. Seriously I was mortified. My classmate told me that in their class she drew a demon on the chalkboard.

  2. actually, Alice is my age. haha

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