Sex and the Pity
A gluttonous day ago, I found myself smashing into the videoke machine of high school classmate Lorinel with Badfinger’s Without You. It was her 11-month-old nephew’s birthday, as we altogether asked why the party a month before. Ralph mentioned that commemorating one’s year of living way ahead of the actual date, superstition says, will just the same make his deathday earlier. The hostess just shrugged off, “We’re going back to Italy in a week, and we wanted to celebrate it here. Besides, they’re Americans.”
When latecomer Tracy showed up, we directed to the deserted dining room and watched her nibble her lunch. Bored and full, Ralph brought out his DVD containing the Kat-Hay scandals— as what Joey de Leon calls them in his column– and made a show. I purchased it from a vending passer-by with only 80 bucks instead of a hundred, he leered. How do you even manage, I thought. The scene was momentous: Tracy engulfing lechon in front of naked people in the screen. “Won’t we get into trouble with this?” I surrendered as Lorinel’s relatives AND visitors strode by. “It’s news,” she just said.
After a while, we squinted at the home-made porn video with pathetic lighting. “In totality, Hayden’s bod is beautiful,” Tracy said, now almost finished with her food. “What? It’s like watching feet having sex!” I told everyone. Ralph only laughed.
Honestly, I have no say to this. I’m not utterly interested– even if a broadsheet columnist announced crime and sex as not an uncommon ingredient to engage human debate, and even if It Is Katrina Halili– for I’m more curious of Vicki Belo’s cheeks. (Jep, Kathie and I speculate that those pacts of skin are too fragile that if you pinch them, you’d have to wait for a full minute for it to go back to its original form!).
Nevertheless, the media are glorifying it (though we cannot blame them. And don’t dare blame them). Hello, the Internet was where the video gained popularity foremost. I grabbed this morning’s Philippine Star and rolled over chuckling over the topics. Sex. Sex videos. Sex. It’s a bigger redundancy and irony I’m even typing about this if it weren’t for the paper. And so Jessica Zafra dropped everything one needs to do to NOT star in an unwanted pito-pito (a term for a quickie film). Everyone needs privacy, she collected.
Apart from that, weekly columnists presented a buffet of Preachings for everyone to read. Jim Paredes wrote that when he googled the scandal, he didn’t find it. AS IF. And then when a friend of his made him view from the laptop, Jim attempted to but thwarted back “after about a minute.” AS IF. Seriously, no such lurid event has happened just yet within that 59 seconds. He ended his column with a Beatitude, “Blessed are those who are laughed at…” ASS IF.
Wilson Lee Flores meanwhile whined that Sarah Geronimo is a better youth role model than the controversial physician. As soon as I read it, I felt doing some caterpillar-like contortions! WhattheF is SarahGeronimodoinginhere?! These people. Catching my breath was difficult.
Boiling things down, the people in the scandal are in need of justice, from every aspect (objectification, privacy issues, etcetera). Justice. Therefore drawing back to reality, this news might linger a little longer as long (alliteration!) as your ale in the sari-sari store goes humming, “I’m never gonna dance again…”
“Vicki Belo has her video too,” Ralph groaned, “What if Sarah Geronimo would have hers too?!” We all gasped, as my left eyebrow leapt to the skies.