Like Cool Epilepsy

No matter how witty Sue Sylvester is, how talented Rachel Berry is, how adorable Quinn Fabray is, or how excellent Ryan Murphy is– by getting remarkable Broadway stars (Chenoweth, Menzel, etc.)– my addiction for Glee would always boil down to resident dumb blond Brittany.

When she entered the club via Quinn’s sinister plan to win back Finn and to destroy New Directions, I knew that she’d make the Cheerios trio an epic mafia. Quinn being bitchy, Santana being slutty and Brittany being, well, mentally vulnerable– altogether reminds me of short Josie and the Pussycats insertions in some ancient Archie comics. But I know that my sweet girl’s beyond that. Cos when she pulls off a classic one-liner, I can’t help but to exclaim, “It’s Brittany, bitch!” so back off you geeks.

Apparently, not only did I and maybe a lot of you think so that Dutch surname-less Brittany is a major factor in the show’s success. With her clueless-ness, impeccable dancing skills and all-around charm, New York Post labeled her as Glee’s ‘secret weapon.’ How about that, huh?

The actress behind the show staple (Yes, she is now!), Heather Morris, was a  full-time dancer who was with Beyonce’s Single Ladies in a 2007 World Tour. Then she was also a competitor in So You Think You Can Dance? but failed anticlimactically. “Everything happens for a reason[…] You have to keep that attitude. After I didn’t get it, I went home and reevaluated things and I said, who cares, I’m gonna do something else,” she said in an Inquirer article. And now, how far has she gone? Miles, I say.

Her hilarity in Glee wasn’t really A for effort, cos she didn’t really use to act. She was a dancer and I saw what she was  made of in a Crazy in Love number in the Hairography episode. But the heck, she can belt out her zingers without even trying! As for my top quotes of her, here they go:

  • Rachel: Where’s Quinn? Brittany: Probably down at the mall looking for elastic waist pants. (Vitamin D)
  • *filming the glee club’s dance routine* “Coach Sylvester didn’t tell me to do this.” (Hairography)
  • Will Schuester: “Take it away, Brittany.” Brittany: “Take what away?” (Hairography)
  • “So, Hairography. It works best when you pretend like you’re getting tasered. So you just move your head around and pretend like you’re spazzing and stuff. You guys, it’s like cool epilepsy.” (Hairography)
  • Santana:”Sex is not dating.” Brittany:”If it were Santana and I would be dating.”(Sectionals)
  • “Sometimes I forget my middle name.” (Hell-0)
  • “I didn’t wear a bra, and I had them turn on the airconditioning.” (Hell-0)
  • “Did you know that dolphins are just gay shark?” (Hell-0)
  • “I’m pretty sure my cat’s been reading my diary.” (Home)
  • “I’ve been here since first period. I had a cold and I took all my antibiotics at the same time, and now I can’t remember how to leave. But I also don’t know why I only made fourth on the Glist, I made out with like everyone in the school, girls,boys, Mr. Kidney the janitor. I need to do something to get into the top 3.” (Bad Reputation)
  • “I don’t know how to turn on a computer.” (Bad Reputation)
  • “There is so many lyrics!” (Laryngitis)
  • “You look terrible, I look awesome.” (Theatricality)

Anyhow, I hope one she’d take a shot for a solo. Like her Cheerio best friend/fuck buddy/off-cam best friend Santana/Naya Rivera who rocks pop. In the following interview, she gives a hint on Britney Spears’s “Hit Me One More Time.” Hmm, can’t wait. As of now, she puts it succinctly with “I can sing. I can. But I don’t know what’s gonna happen.”

And so, I have to ask…


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About barrycyrus

Hi, I'm Barry Viloria, 21 and not a blogger. I occasionally bitch about what's hot, what's not, what's life-threatening and what's Blake Lively wearing but I refuse to be called a "blogger." That's it.

Posted on June 7, 2010, in Persona, Tube and tagged , , , . Bookmark the permalink. 18 Comments.

  1. Fuck, I love Brittany next to Kurt. I love how stereotypical Glee can get. And I will never forget her ‘Did you know that dolphins are just gay shark?’ line. 🙂 And I did a little research myself like two weeks ago. I just found out that she was a contestant on SYTYCD, kaya pala magaling sya sumayaw. Haven’t heard her sing though.

    It took me about four re-reads to realize that you were referring to the world tour and not the Single Ladies video because I could swear she wasn’t there. Or was she?

    • I think that’s the formula behind Glee to not get the audience get confused. They build archetypes since the cast is too big. Hehe. Yep, she was in So You Think… And she blows us off with every dance number.

      She should really SING!!!!

  2. I haven’t watched television for some time. Aw, actually for the longest time. I am using ‘teh’ internet to watch US series through tubes and through downloads. Did watch a couple of Glee episodes, but I have a lot of watching marathon to do as I am halfway the storyline. Yey.

  3. LOVE LOVE LOVE Brittany! And Santana! 🙂

  4. Waaaa! Gaya-gaya!!! I love Brittany. ❤

  5. I guess Brittany is ok with all of her quotes, and brain power =],
    but my love for Emma – “the school’s mysophobic guidance counselor”
    could not be stronger =D.

  6. I like Brittany too. I like her most during their production for regionals (Journey songs). She’s really a cool dancer and she’s hot – real hot. ^^.

  7. I love Britt too. She drives everyone crazy.

  8. I love Brittany, but I adore Fuck. Este Puck. =P

  1. Pingback: [391] It’s Britney/Brittany, Bitch! « I D I O T B O X

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